slipping in between

Die Sekunde vor dem Aufprall ist die friedlichste.

Of course you’ll find millions of boxes, small ones and big ones and those in between, and you’ll try to make it fit, you’ll try hard to make everything fit inside of them, and it will, it does. You can put people inside of them, and they will fit, and from time to time you might close one of the boxes and open another one, but never let them confuse you, and don’t you confuse them.

You can also put feelings inside of your boxes, all the feelings you ever felt, nicely put together and nicely sorted out. So easy to put the disturbing ones aside, so easy to concentrate on the big ones, on those one has to concentrate on. Society says so. And all these opinions and interests, wonderfully stapled upon eachother, creating a great image of your self, an image you like, this is what I want to represent, this is who I am! – Is this who I am?

Is this who you are.

You consist of the music you listen to, of the places you go to, the people you chat with when you feel like talking to someone. And you are reaching out for this special feeling the media promises, a feeling you wouldn’t even be able to describe but know it exists, somewhere, and you will know when it’s there.

You will know.

And they lived happily ever after; this is what you want, this is the promise they made to you: You’ll find someone who saves you, someone who will colour your world, lighten it up, rescue you from everything you’re afraid of, from all these nightmares and fears. So you keep searching, because this feeling, it’s going to be like pure bliss, it’s going to be so amazing, and you can’t wait, you just can’t wait for it.

But you have to. And you will. And you will get tired and, because you want, want it so much, you’ll have to let go of it, as we mostly find the things we’re not looking for.

Don't we?